What is love language
The term love languages refer to the way in which you communicate your love to your partner, the way you express affection for the people you love and care about and the way you want them to express affection for you.
If you are in a relationship where you are experiencing discomfort in the little things your partner does or say, it could be because you are speaking different love languages from your partner.
This could be a case where you crave physical touch from your partner but instead you are receiving words of affirmation.
The 5 love languages and how to tell what is yours
Everyone has a love language, that is the way in which they express their love to their partner. This does not have to be someone you are in a relationship with, it could be your friend or family.
- Quality Time
This is where you crave undivided attention from your partner, where the both of you can spend time together enjoying each other’s company without being interrupted.
If you constantly wanting to be with your partner rather than texting or just hearing from them, and the only way you feel comfortable enough is when they are around them, then this is a sign that your love language is quality time.
- Receiving Gifts
Giving gifts to your partner is also a way to express your affection in a relationship. This love language does not require one to shower their partners with large or expensive gifts, even the simplest things such as your partners favorite drink, flowers or even notes can be a way to show your love to gifts lovers.
If you are a person that feel less loved because you are not receiving gifts, to make you feel comfortable in your relationship, then this is your love language.
People who speaks the love language always expects a gift and if they do not receive one they often time feel like they are not loved or special to their partner.
- Physical Touch
This has to do with how one shows love through cuddling, kissing, hugging and being intimate in a relationship.
Individuals who crave physical touch are always expecting their partners to show affection by simply showing them they care in ways that requires touch such as hugging both in public and private.
If you feel like you are not loved or cared for, simply because you are not getting the opportunity to be close to your partner, or even hugging or kissing then your language is physical touch.
- Act of Service
This is showing affection by performing a task or action for your partner to make them feel loved.
Acts of service includes, bringing your partner breakfast in bed, cleaning the house or even doing an errand for him or her to make them feel loved.
These type of people always love to ask their partners for favors, just to find out if they are truly loved.
If you are a person who tend to feel unwanted because your partner does not do things as these then your language is acts of service.
- Words of Affirmation
This type of love language is mostly done using words, ways in which you express how you feel or care about someone.
These types of people appreciate complements and words that support, encourage and reassure them.
People who actually looks for words of affirmation from their partners needs to hear how their partner feel about them such as “I appreciate you and you are the best thing that ever happen to me”
If you find yourself being uncomfortable and feeling less loved because you are not hearing these things, then your language is words of affirmation.
How do you most often express your love and appreciation to others?
What do you crave most in a relationship? comment down below
Advani, P. (August 11, 2013). How random acts of kindness can benefit your health. Huffington Post.
Chapman, G. D. (1995). The five love languages: How to express heartfelt commitment to your mate. Chicago: Northfield Pub.
Chapman, G. D. (2009). Speaking the love language of quality time. Retrieved from 5lovelanguages.com
Gallace, A. & Spence, C. (2010). The science of interpersonal touch: An overview. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 34, 246–259.
November 8, 2020
How to tell what your love language is: 5 love languages
Target audience: young adults and adults who are going through relationship challenges because them and their partner speak different love language.